Disagreement is not the same as "Entitlement"

A bunch of entitled brats.

Over two centuries ago a document was written which demanded rights for a group of farmers who felt that the policies imposed by their mother government were not fair.
The document stated that there were certain rights that they were “unalienable” and are “endowed by their Creator.”
Fifty-six men then signed what is now known as the Declaration of Independence. It stands as a symbol of the greatness of our country and its beliefs.
Lately, there has been a lot of talk about the “Spirit of Entitlement.” Unfortunately, many students have changed the meaning of this phrase to suppress reform by making opinionated students feel like heretics. It seems if you don’t agree with a policy, then you are “entitled.”
By this definition that many students have concocted, the Founding Fathers had the “Spirit of Entitlement” in their hearts.
I am grateful that our Founding Fathers felt they deserved equal rights and ignored their British loyalist peers who probably felt like they were acting “entitled.”
Of course there are students who want convenient parking spaces, special academic treatment and more subsidies on tuition. These are things that a student doesn’t deserve by default.
However, if students have grievances with a policy they should be able to express them, especially if those students are speaking on something that affects the student body collectively and not for their own self-interests or special treatment.
President Kim B. Clark gave a devotional on “Protection Against the Spirit of Entitlement.” This talk was given Sept. 14, 2010.
“Often those who succumb to the spirit of entitlement feel superior to those around them, or believe certain rules should not apply to them, or that they should not be require to do what everyone else has to do,” Clark said.
It is true that a feeling that you are an exception to the rules is wrong. However, the misunderstanding that this includes anyone who disagrees with a policy and seeks for reform is a false notion.
There are many things we are not necessarily entitled to. But despite how misconstrued “the spirit of entitlement” has become, we are always entitled to opinions and the ability to lobby for change.
That’s what makes our country great.

A few comments on the responses on my column

I would like to say a few things about my recent column in light of all the animosity that I have received.

First, is curfew really for our morality? If someone wants to be sexual deviant, then curfew only becomes another rule to break.
 
Married students are not under attack in the column, so it is sad to see how many are getting defensive. The point of the column is to address inconsistencies in the honor code, not to impose a curfew on married students.
 
The "If you don't like it, then get out" argument is no better than the ignorant people who say the same thing about our country. "If you don't like the government, then you can go move to France with all the other wussies." That isn't the solution. The solution is to speak up when you don't agree with a policy.
It is true that I knew what I was signing up for when I became enrolled in the school. That doesn't mean that I should ignore the policies that I disagree with. Conversely, it means that I should help bring about change. That's the beauty of freedom, which we unfortunately do not entirely enjoy at BYU-Idaho. It disappoints me to see how many students are willing to give up there freedoms.

I have been called "immature" and "bratty" for writing the column. I fail to see the immaturity in my writing. Furthermore, I fail to see how expressing one's opinion about a policy he or she doesn't agree with denotes immaturity. If that is the case, then every active and aware citizen of this country is immature. Taking a stand on an issue rather than sitting there and "dealing with it" isn't childish. In fact, it's quite mature. 

Finally, since I wrote this article there have been a lot of attacks on me personally. This is odd considering how many people have called me immature. Though I apparently lack the maturity to lecture everyone on common decency, I will attempt it by reminding everyone that it is the opinion piece that should be under fire and not me personally.

Fairness in the BYU-Idaho honor code for single students

When I was a child, my parents gave me a curfew, chores and a designated room in my home. It was assumed that when I became an adult that I would be able to make those decisions for myself.

I am 25 years old. I pay my own tuition, housing, insurance and other bills. However, at BYU-Idaho I have a curfew, clean checks and restricted choices in housing. Despite my age, experience and amount of responsibilities, I am still treated as though I am a child.  

Contrarily, married students have no curfew, clean checks or housing restrictions. Despite the age of married students, they are treated like adults who are capable of handling themselves, which is different from the treatment of single students. For example, my 19-year-old married friend can go see the midnight showing of "Harry Potter" without fear of reprimand or punishment.

True, the honor code protects students in many ways. Curfew helps to protect the morality of students. However, these rules should be the same for all students. For instance, either married students should receive a curfew or single students should have theirs lifted.

In comparing the treatment of single and married students, one seems more privileged than the other. It is wrong to treat one group of students different than another because they haven't had the opportunity to get married. What's worse is when a single student complains about their unfair treatment, they are met with responses like, "Well, you should just get married and you won't have to worry about it." I'm trying, but thanks for the reminder.

I firmly believe that if you treat someone like a child, then they will become a child. This childish treatment of single students not only encourages immaturity, but also cripples their ability to manage themselves in a real world setting.

I do not need to be told when to come in at night, when to clean my room and where to live. I am an adult, and am capable of making my own decisions. The inconsistency in the rules is unfair and insulting to single students.

Let adults be adults, despite their marital status.

New Epidemic: Split Relationship Disorder

Working hard to keep it from spreading.

Men have feelings. That being said, a man’s feelings can be hurt.

Heartache is impossible to avoid in the dating world. However, some pain can be prevented.

When one person is not fully invested in a relationship, it can be taxing on the other. It is worse when an individual seems very invested when around the other, but tells a different story to his or her roommates. This condition is known as Split Relationship Disorder.

Though women are not necessarily to blame, they tend to have this disorder more than men do. Lately, there has been an outbreak of Split Relationship Disorder that is causing needless torment.

For example, a girl meets a guy who she enjoys being around. They go on several dates, which lead to handholding, kissing and other strong signs of affection.

The male in this situation feels safe to assume that they are a couple. However, when the female is not around him she is torn and debates ending relations with him. Thus, the guy falls victim to the girl’s indecisiveness and restraint.

The indecisiveness isn’t the lethal symptom in this ailment. Rather, hollow expressions and lack of communication are causing heartache.

Acting as two different people in a relationship is deceitful to both the victim and the deceiver. The victim feels that everything is well when it isn’t. The deceiver becomes numb by denying their apprehensions while with the other person. It’s easy to forget about another’s feelings when under the effects of this anesthesia.

There are several causes of “split relationship disorder.” For example, some feel that a committed relationship would ruin opportunities that could come while in the relationship. If you are too concerned with closing doors, then you will never open one.

Others may feel that they need time to make a decision about the relationship. This is important but should not be done while cuddling.

Communication is the cure. As a general rule, if you can talk to your roommates about him, then you should talk to him. Talk to each other. If you are still deciding whether to be in a committed relationship, then let them know. Don’t pretend to be something that you’re not. Otherwise, the pain will stronger than the discomfort of being honest.

Make a decision about being a couple before being a couple.

Garage Explosion in Roanoke County

Reed Bohon and Fire Marshall Scott Jones survey the remains

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A Roanoke County man's garage exploded into flames destroying it completely and damaging part of his house on the afternoon of Dec 27.

Reed Bohon was startled by noise outside of his house that he thought was a car accident. He looked out the window and saw smoke pluming from the garage through the bay doors and windows.

Roanoke County Fire Station 11 was the first on the scene with Engine 11, along with other fire trucks. The fire was raging when they got there. Despite the damage from the fire no one was hurt.

Dean Peroulas, Captain of Fire Station 11, said that their main concern was Bohon's house did not catch on fire.

Engine 11 experienced hardships while trying to contain the fire. Getting water to the fire was difficult. The wind made it difficult to keep the fire away from house.

Firefighters set up a water shuttle to transport water from hydrants close by.

"Sometimes we ran out [of water], but most of the time we had enough water to do what we need to do," said Peroulas.

Though the fire did not destroy the home, it melted the siding and caused smoke damage.

Scott Jones, a Roanoke County Fire Inspector, said that he estimates the damages to be $80 to $100 thousand.

Fire inspectors are still determining what caused the fire, though there are many sources that could have started the blaze.

"A lot of heat and electrical sources in here," said Jones. "So far we have not come up with anything yet, but it is still under investigation."

Power tools, a pickup truck and vintage tractor parts were some of the most expensive things that Bohon lost in the fire.

"It's all up in smoke," said Bohon.

Mistakes help us learn

Film forces you to make mistakes. It's a good thing.

In the Shakespearean play "Othello", the character Iago said, "But men are men; the best sometimes forget."

No one is perfect. Yet, it is easy to forget this when your scholarship depends on what happens in the testing center.

It is our human instincts to avoid pain, embarrassment or discomfort. Therefore, we naturally avoid mistakes and shun them as skeletons in the closet.  However, a fear of mistakes can be debilitating because they are impossible to avoid entirely.

I have trained many photographers while I have been photo editor. Many of them have never used anything more than their Facebook-ready cameras, so they have to be trained on the basics. Many members of my staff have asked what they should do to improve their skills. I tell them to buy a film camera.

The shock on their face after hearing this is more entertaining to me than NBC on a Thursday night.

There is a reason why this seemingly archaic medium is so important to a photographer's progression. It takes time, money and a great deal of thought to produce an image with film. However, film helps a photographer learn how to take a real photograph rather than a trial-and-error image.

Unlike digital photography where there are few consequences, mistakes in film are much more costly. These mistakes hurt, but that's how we learn.

The same principle applies to all aspects of life. The course of our lives depends on the choices we make. Many times the fear of making a mistake leads us to the path of least resist. However, the path of least resistance can quickly become the path of least learning.

Dr. Judith Wright, a motivational speaker and author of "The One Decision" said that creative minds "do not see mistakes as indictments, they see them as data."

R. L. E. Schwarzenberger, a German Mathmatician, said, "The willingness to make mistakes and to learn from them should become an important element in problem-solving and in investigations."

Granted, it is not a good idea to go out and intentionally make mistakes, and trial-and-error is a poor approach to test taking. However living with an understanding that mistakes will happen and then committing to them will enhance learning.

The problem could stem from a lack of accountability. We refuse to own up to our mistakes when they are made. A failure to do so inhibits learning and the gaining of experience. When we make an incorrect decision, we need to accept it as a mistake and learn from it.

In simpler terms, be humble.

Use pens instead of pencils., get back up after falling off of the skateboard or go on a date with that person you've been eyeing in your class without fear. Commit to making mistakes and embrace error as a gift.

Seattle: Days 20-22: "Wrapping up"

It is the day before I leave Seattle. I am going to miss this place, but it is time to continue on. I need to see my family at home before I go back to school.

On Sunday I went to a singles ward meeting where converts spoke about how they came to find the church. I realized that this area is full of people who have found themselves here just like me. I fit in.

I scheduled an interview with the Editor in Chief of the Bellevue Reporter. If I get the internship, perhaps I will be in this area for longer.

For now, it's time to pack. I'll miss this place.